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Originally Posted by Drachen
urinal poop > toilet poop

but was the urinal poop your own?
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Old 03-15-2005, 02:38 PM VB is offline  

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Old 03-15-2005, 02:40 PM Repute is offline  

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so this happened while i was deployed.

i worked swing shift so it was from arround 4pm to midnight/1am. i woke up too late to eat at the chow hall so i had to get some food togo. the only thing they had available was at the shoppette onbase so i grabbed 2 beef & bean burritoes. ate those and was laying down on my cot at arround 2:00 am and felt my stomache rumbling i thought it was just gas so just stayed in my cot. and it was freezing ass cold outside so i didnt want to go outside. and at arround 3:00 am i woke up again. this time i knew i had to take a shit and slowly got out of my cot, not wanting to take a shit int he shitter tents i decided to walk to work and take a shit...(there are 3 shitting alternatives, work (the nicest, has toilets etc, porta poties the worst alternative, its got no deoderizers in it and smells aweful, and the shitter tent, not that bad) at that time the gas build up in my intestine was so bad i had to stop for a brief moment to relieve it through a 15 second long fart and started to realize that there was no way i could have made it to work to take a shit, so i slowly walked towards the shitter tent to do my business. it was the worst shit i have ever had in my life
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Old 03-15-2005, 02:45 PM prometheum is offline  

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Old 03-15-2005, 02:54 PM stapler is offline  

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Originally Posted by itburnswhenipee
Ryans Steakhouse story:
i can't believe i read the whole thing
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Old 03-15-2005, 03:00 PM Gloibin is offline  

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Originally Posted by Chavez
Teacher got crapowned!

fake edit: Someone needs to make a but from the opposite end
Old 03-15-2005, 03:15 PM Genualdi is offline  

When I was 8 years old, this happened.

1. I was eating a really good sandwich.
2. Drank a lot of Coke before hand.
3. Felt a fart coming on.
4. Farted- or so I thought for about 10 minutes.
5. Realized I had crap in my pants after scratching my ass.
6. Being the leet that I am- I asked for my Dad's overshirt as it was cold outside and I wanted to be in the car.
7. Tied said shirt around waist and exited establishment, no one the wiser. I went outside and hid in some trees and went commando.
8. We went home, and no one ever knew.
9. ...
10. ...
11. I tried to type some ........ links back there.
12. Not really.
13. ...
14. Profit!

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Old 03-15-2005, 03:19 PM thetooflepope is offline  

I think i was 12 years old, was in the middle of the very last baseball game of our tournament, and it was my turn at bat. My stomach was making the sounds as if apocalypse was hitting Earth and it had just gone out of control. I said to my coach "i have to go to the bathroom, really. Get someone to fill in for me" he asked the ump and the ump said "no he must have his turn at bat" which made me really pissed off. So i'm standing at the plate with my ass cheeks clenched as much as i could hold them, for i knew if i waited any longer, i was going to drop an A-Bomb out of my ass. I got pitched an easy fast ball - i cranked the ball really far (i had never hit a home run that whole season) so i ran the bases, ran home, and continued to run to the stalls that were 100 yards away. I ripped open the door, smashed it shut, planted my ass on the toilet seat, and just let it go. It felt like i was giving birth out of my ass. But when it was done, i felt so refreshed. I ran back to the diamond, while my teammates were laughing at me.
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Old 03-15-2005, 03:39 PM oVeRmYhEaD is offline  

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Last edited by Genualdi; 03-15-2005 at 04:22 PM..
Old 03-15-2005, 04:12 PM Genualdi is offline  

Here's another one:

1) I was 8.
2) I had to shit.
3) Toilet was clogged.
4) Parents both refuse to drive me somewhere to take a shit.
5) Make me shit in a bucket.
6) Brother and sister begin singing the "Mr. Bucket" song from that old commercial.
8) No profit.
Old 03-15-2005, 04:21 PM powertickle is offline  

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Old 03-15-2005, 04:24 PM Baloneyflaps. is offline  

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Originally Posted by Baloneyflaps
[IM G][/IMG]

Old 03-15-2005, 04:54 PM Genualdi is offline  

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I admit it, this thread made me keekle A LOT!
So crazy he just might work!

31759a07a80f479395982696de30ec0d [y yuo throw haet :( :(] porn may <3's yuo.
Old 03-15-2005, 05:01 PM Penelope is offline  

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best thread this forum has had in a while. nice to see posts that consist of full, coherant sentences
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Old 03-15-2005, 05:18 PM AltronHGX is offline  

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Old 03-15-2005, 05:35 PM DarrPara is offline  


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