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Suma Diock
 
You'll never get over it, not completely.

You'll just learn to accept it, move on, and hopefully learn something from it.
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Old 02-18-2009, 07:30 PM Suma Diock is offline  
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BobSutan
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Originally Posted by AK____xD View Post
the key to this is killing time.

stay active and avoid time alone where you would think about her. call up some buddies and go hang out, go hit up the gym and work out.

I've been there in the past and this advice worked wonders for me. It helped that when I got back to where I lived after my trip (dumped part way through) I saw her at the club. First thing out of her mouth was a little drool and then "OMG you look like Stallone!" No better payback than that then maybe hooking up and PIITB.
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Old 02-18-2009, 09:54 PM BobSutan is offline  
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#17  

DR_K13
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Quote:
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wtf? I hope you are exaggerating, otherwise seek help.

This goes for men and women on average. I read some study out of UCLA about this, maybe its just people in LA
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Old 02-18-2009, 10:15 PM DR_K13 is offline  
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#18  

vinnie
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You hid the pictures because...?

Fire. Sweet cleansing fire. It is sort of cliche, but sort of fun to burn shit from old relationships. Make sure you do it well away from buildings and do not use too much accelerant though. Smash stuff too, I had a picture frame I thought was resin and plastic. Turned out it was ceramic and glass. Very satisfying, a little messy though. Watch out for pointy bits.

As for the rest of it, nothing a little time and a few loose women will not help.
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Old 02-18-2009, 10:15 PM vinnie is offline  
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#19  

Dauz
 
odds are not as long as you think, ive seen it many times in my friends, the averages posted ^ seem about right, but its different for different types of people, dont be like me im lame, i take YEARS! lol
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Old 02-21-2009, 02:45 AM Dauz is offline  
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#20  

Mr.Coffea
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I don't understand your drastic mesures to get her out of your life.... what's the point?

I hate it when people have a "bad" breakup (this one doesn't seem so bad) and then act like they never knew each other. Fuck the person was part of your life for 3 years, unless there was violence or some really fucked up situation, I don't see why can't at least be civil about it. There's no shame in staying friends or keeping in touch.

I don't go out of my way to keep in touch with girls I've broken up with, but if I happen to see them I'm very happy. I don't see what deleting them from my phone or facebook would give me, why fool myself into believing those days never existed?

The only way you're going to get over this girl is by going out there and finding someone else. I'm lucky to live in a big city that's filled to the brim with some of the hottest girls you can find, so things are a little easier for me, but I'm sure you can find someone out there. Once you find someone better looking/more interesting, you'll probably forget about your ex
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Old 02-23-2009, 08:30 PM Mr.Coffea is offline  
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#21  

nostradamus
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Thanks for the advice guys. I appreciate it.

It's been a week since we broke up and this has been one of the hardest weeks of my life (comparable to having family members dying). I've been trying to stay busy; running, working out, going out at night, but I find myself thinking about her almost all the time. Hopefully this will get better with time.

To Mr Coffea's post above; I've stopped talking to her so I can get over her easier and faster. She's the one that broke up with me and I still want to be together, so I don't think I could take talking to her normally. Don't worry, I won't be forgetting these last three years anytime soon. I still care about her a lot and I want to know how she's doing but at the same time I don't want to look like a heartbroken desperate fool (which I am). She had been having some personal things going on (dad got diagnosed with prostate cancer) and I want to be there for her but she broke up with me, what am I supposed to do.

My friends have told me to get with other women, but even though I might have had a chance this weekend it felt wrong, kind of like I would have been cheating. I think it's too soon. But I don't know what else will help me. I know I shouldn't be doing this but my mind can't help but think about getting back together with her all the time. FUCK!!!!

I guess I have to wait it out some more. :emo:
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Old 02-23-2009, 10:40 PM nostradamus is offline  
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#22  

virus28
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr.Coffea View Post
I don't understand your drastic mesures to get her out of your life.... what's the point?

I hate it when people have a "bad" breakup (this one doesn't seem so bad) and then act like they never knew each other. Fuck the person was part of your life for 3 years, unless there was violence or some really fucked up situation, I don't see why can't at least be civil about it. There's no shame in staying friends or keeping in touch.

I don't go out of my way to keep in touch with girls I've broken up with, but if I happen to see them I'm very happy. I don't see what deleting them from my phone or facebook would give me, why fool myself into believing those days never existed?

The only way you're going to get over this girl is by going out there and finding someone else. I'm lucky to live in a big city that's filled to the brim with some of the hottest girls you can find, so things are a little easier for me, but I'm sure you can find someone out there. Once you find someone better looking/more interesting, you'll probably forget about your ex

sometimes the reminder that you are no longer with the person you love is too much to bare.
Old 02-24-2009, 06:26 AM virus28 is offline  
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#23  

wilse
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nostradamus View Post
Thanks for the advice guys. I appreciate it.

It's been a week since we broke up and this has been one of the hardest weeks of my life (comparable to having family members dying). I've been trying to stay busy; running, working out, going out at night, but I find myself thinking about her almost all the time. Hopefully this will get better with time.

To Mr Coffea's post above; I've stopped talking to her so I can get over her easier and faster. She's the one that broke up with me and I still want to be together, so I don't think I could take talking to her normally. Don't worry, I won't be forgetting these last three years anytime soon. I still care about her a lot and I want to know how she's doing but at the same time I don't want to look like a heartbroken desperate fool (which I am). She had been having some personal things going on (dad got diagnosed with prostate cancer) and I want to be there for her but she broke up with me, what am I supposed to do.

My friends have told me to get with other women, but even though I might have had a chance this weekend it felt wrong, kind of like I would have been cheating. I think it's too soon. But I don't know what else will help me. I know I shouldn't be doing this but my mind can't help but think about getting back together with her all the time. FUCK!!!!

I guess I have to wait it out some more. :emo:

why would you still want to be with her if she's making you feel this way? it doesn't make any sense... don't you have any self-respect?
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Old 02-24-2009, 07:13 AM wilse is offline  
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#24  

nostradamus
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Oh man... I made a mistake. I talked to her again because one of her friends told me to. I'm so weak

But although it kind of made me feel a lot worse, I can at least see the positive side of us talking. I now know for sure that there is no chance of us getting back together, and that kind of gives me closure. I'm never talking to her again, at least until I am 100% sure that I am over her.

Although I feel like absolute shite, let the healing process commence!
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Old 02-25-2009, 10:16 PM nostradamus is offline  
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#25  

ElectribeCyanide
 
I think I'll always miss my first real girlfriend that I loved unconditionally... I swear she'll randomly pop in my mind once or twice a week.

That was 5 years ago... But it's different from the first years as they're all good memories now almost like a childhood trip or experience.
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Old 02-25-2009, 10:49 PM ElectribeCyanide is offline  
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#26  

RubberDuck
 
Just a shoutout to nostradamus, I'm in exactly the same boat. My girlfriend and I were living togther and 3 years down the line (a few weeks ago) she says her feelings aren't the same anymore and that she's not in love with me now.

It's horrible, and i'm currently in the process of packing up all my stuff to move out of the house that we chose together. I've wasted the past month by not allowing myself to heal because we've still been living in the same house, although there wasn't much i could do about that since my family live 200 miles away and i had to find somewhere to live. I didn't want to break up, but she did and she's evidently more happy now because of it.... which is very hard to swallow. But I'm pretty sure in time i can put this behind me.

let us know how you're getting on, and best of luck mate, i know how you're feeling
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Old 02-28-2009, 08:04 AM RubberDuck is offline  
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#27  

Nazbot
 
Tiimmmeeeee.

It will probably be a very, very, very long time before you're truly over them. You might see people in the meantime but unless lots of time passes it won't help.

You basically have to be able to clear your mind and look forward to a future without them. That's hard to do and why it takes time to go by, new good things to happen to you, etc before you can really feel happy about the future without them there.

Just to give you some hope, though, it happens this way for everyone. Everyone here who's gone through this type of breakup can tell you that it's not a formula, or set of actions that help get over someone. It's just making it through the long period of time it takes your brain to unwire itself. You might not feel it's possible but you WILL eventually get over this person.

btw nothing weak about wanting to talk with her.
Old 03-05-2009, 01:55 PM Nazbot is offline  
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#28  

spanxxx
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it's been 9 months since i've dumped my ex, and i haven't talked to him once since. and i doubt i'll ever talk to him again, mind you, it was a very different situation.

i don't really know how to describe how i felt. definitely angry and very stupid. but in the end i knew i had done the right thing.

essentially i was pretty lucky because i was right at the start of my vacation, so i was able to go away for a few days to chill at my parents' house. in this time, i had a lot of girl talks with friends, and did a lot of thinking. i would have been a wreck if i had to go to work the next day.

when i got back, i hung out with friends, met new people, and started going out on the weekends. i met boys and went on lots of dates with lots of randoms. i didn't sleep with the first guy i met though.

of course i had my moments, and i've learned a lot from my experiences. and i can now look back and reflect.. i do still get pissed when i think about the situation.

i've met someone new, and we're now all cute and dating.. take your time and don't rush things... go out with the guys, drink beer and eat wings. go on some dates - meet new ppl.

good luck
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Old 03-13-2009, 06:53 PM spanxxx is offline  
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#29  

Redemption
 
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I got broken up with before Valentine's day by my girlfriend of over 3 years because I've watched porn before. I don't even know where to begin with how betrayed I feel by this, and I'm going to be fucked up for a long time because of it.
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Old 03-14-2009, 12:29 AM Redemption is offline  
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