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asa
I wear ladies underwear, and I smell like cheese.
 
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door locks work occasionally? that doesn't sound like BMW quality!
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Old 09-08-2011, 08:43 AM asa is offline  
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[H]ard|On
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Sounds like someone had a shitty aftermarket alarm installed by "technicians" at Best Buy
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Old 09-08-2011, 12:16 PM [H]ard|On is offline  
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Cannonbear
 
Nope, no aftermarket alarm. Bone stock except for short antenna and clear third tail light which is breaking in half for some reason, time to throw on the old one.

BMW quality is great engine, shaky everything else ;p (i know plenty have bmws with no problems, just bitching out loud i guess.)
Old 09-08-2011, 12:21 PM Cannonbear is offline  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cannonbear View Post
Nope, no aftermarket alarm. Bone stock except for short antenna and clear third tail light which is breaking in half for some reason, time to throw on the old one.

BMW quality is great engine, shaky everything else ;p (i know plenty have bmws with no problems, just bitching out loud i guess.)


Well not everything, the rear end is good, tranny is good, interior is nice, etc What else have you had problems with? We can take care of it right here hehe...

This shit thankfully doesn't affect e36, but some e46, z4, z8 and x3

http://www.bmwgm5.com/


This can start after someone had an alarm installed but it can fail for other reasons.
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Old 09-08-2011, 01:27 PM [H]ard|On is offline  
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Cannonbear
 
Update, after anotehr unsuccessful smog attempt my bmw tech buddy finally got back to me and told me the full diagnostic start up procedure (which is weird and hard to do where i live). did it and finally fucking passed haha

so far the only thing else wrong with the car is the roof motor going out (which i expected when i bought it). other then that fairly rock solid besides a few problems that are probably owner caused haha
Old 09-10-2011, 10:09 AM Cannonbear is offline  
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Lurker
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Post the procedure if you dont mind, it may come in useful for someone else.
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Old 09-10-2011, 02:09 PM Lurker is offline  
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#36  

BonneMe
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cannonbear View Post
Update, after anotehr unsuccessful smog attempt my bmw tech buddy finally got back to me and told me the full diagnostic start up procedure (which is weird and hard to do where i live). did it and finally fucking passed haha

so far the only thing else wrong with the car is the roof motor going out (which i expected when i bought it). other then that fairly rock solid besides a few problems that are probably owner caused haha

Roof motor huh? I've just got the broken shade that flies forward when I brake hard...

Nice to see the problem was taken care of. Did you check the intake boot for rips as well? I hear they like to crack.
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Old 09-10-2011, 08:20 PM BonneMe is offline  
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#37  

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cannonbear View Post
Update, after anotehr unsuccessful smog attempt my bmw tech buddy finally got back to me and told me the full diagnostic start up procedure (which is weird and hard to do where i live). did it and finally fucking passed haha

so far the only thing else wrong with the car is the roof motor going out (which i expected when i bought it). other then that fairly rock solid besides a few problems that are probably owner caused haha

Cliffs: newbs

lol
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Old 09-11-2011, 02:41 PM [H]ard|On is offline  
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#38  

grjr
 
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Cliffs: newbs

lol

yea, we don't speak german here
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Old 09-11-2011, 06:37 PM grjr is offline  
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Tex Arcana
I am a mean disrespectful person hiding anonymously and need an attitude adjustment.
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cannonbear View Post
bmw diagnostic start up procedure
  1. Put key in ignition;
  2. Insert penis in tailpipe;
  3. Hump tailpipe 3 times;
  4. Turn ignition to "on-veriflugelfarhter" (1/3 midway between "on" and "start");
  5. Honk horn 3 times with penis;
  6. Insert finger in cigarettenflamenflugenplatz;
  7. Chant first three lines of BMW owner's manual in German to the tune of "The Sound of Music";
  8. Lay dead squirrel across battery terminals, and fry to a golden brown;
  9. Press red reset button under dash;
  10. ...
  11. Profit?
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Old 09-14-2011, 05:47 PM Tex Arcana is offline  
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#40  

[H]ard|On
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Speaking of i have to do all this. It's time to get this thing smogged.... MEH
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Old 09-14-2011, 11:18 PM [H]ard|On is offline  
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