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RedTalon19
 
too depressed to fap

well yesterday i decided to take the 2.5 hour drive out to penn state main campus to visit an old friend i hadnt seen since high school (almost 2 years) her name is kristin and she just happens to be the biggest crush i've ever had.

http://www.genmay.net/showthread.php?s=&threadid=72059

that thread pretty much sums up what happened. if your too lazy to read... found out she has a boyfriend, is trying not to cheat on him and basically we just hung out and talked a lot. now the kicker about the boyfriend is she met him 2 weeks before winter break and now hes a few hours away student teaching...

i will admit it was great seein her again and just talkin about old times but on my drive home i felt myself getting more and more depressed until i realized she played me for a fool and i'd do it again in an instant w/o question or doubt.

now to my current problem (that i'm posting about anyways)... last night i thought i'd try fappin to fall asleep faster, get my mind off things.... once i got it up i just couldnt concentrate on the pr0n. i played it off as too much on my mind. happened again at like 4am when i still coudlnt sleep and just now at around 9am... took me like 5 min just to get hard and once it was i gave up after a minute. i thought i'd try picturing this girl kristin as i had before but this time i could only picture her face (and not her nice ass or tits) and i found myself with dick in hand just thinking about how beautiful she looks.

what the fuck is wrong with me. i feel like cuz i cant even fap anymore... not even with lesbo pr0n which usually gets me right off... and it was new stuff too (thank you ftp ) just typing this up i cant stop thinkin about this girl.... just thinking aobut that and how i'd never get to be with her unless god himself came down from heaven and took pity on me with his personal blessing... and that aint gonna happen all that just makes me more depressed and feel like everything i even do is futile

edit - i just realized i havnt eating anything yet today and all i had to eat yesterday was 2 pop tarts at like 1pm while we were in her room... and i'm not even hungry. i just dont care.

Last edited by RedTalon19; 01-15-2003 at 06:37 AM..
Old 01-15-2003, 05:49 AM RedTalon19 is offline  
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#1  

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Kremlin
 
Woah I read that wrong at first... penn state... not state penn...
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Old 01-15-2003, 07:32 AM Kremlin is offline  
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Spoonie
 
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Do some mindless activities.
Play Quake 3 or something.
Go do some exercise.
Get drunk.
Sleep.
Don't bother fapping.
Old 01-15-2003, 08:00 AM Spoonie is offline  
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#3  

Half Asian Guy
 
once a woman is on your mind she stays there...it might take a while to get over but it'll happen...cleaning or rearranging furniture or taking computer apart always helped me...
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Old 01-15-2003, 08:42 AM Half Asian Guy is offline  
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RedTalon19
 
well right now i'm watching a movie... its helping a bit but not much. i do have to fry a computer and throw down an OS later on today... maybe i'll do that soon than i wanted to

i dont get it, i went to school with this girl for years and now suddenly seeing her again after 2 years i'm totally enthatuated with her??? i honestly cant go 5 minutets w/o thinking about her. now i know what the rest of you guys are going through when you describe a similiar situation... i never thought i'd let myself get into this position but here i am and i didnt even know it until it hit me on that drive home
Old 01-15-2003, 09:01 AM RedTalon19 is offline  
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razer1
 
condolensces dude. depending on how much you want her, you could be in for a rough ride. a few months ago when i got turned down by someone i really liked, fapping was the least of my worries. i couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, couldn't concentrate on my work, didn't feel like going out... it was nuts. by you'll get over it, and what makes it go even faster is talking to other people (namely, other fine girls). anyways, have a beer, and prepare to wether the storm. pm me if you ever need to talk. good luck.
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Old 01-15-2003, 09:07 AM razer1 is offline  
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MrMaN383
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this, my friend, is why you dont do things for women. last year i too had a girl at PSU main. at the time i was at school myself, probably an hour and a half/2 hour drive. did i drive up to visit her? fuck no, i made her drive down to stay over at my place, fucked her on my roommates bed, sent her home the next day. its all about power man... dont let them have any.
Old 01-15-2003, 01:19 PM MrMaN383 is offline  
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RedTalon19
 
i dont see it as i got pwnd by her (well technically i did but still) its more like i'm falling for a woman i can never have. i didnt realize this until i saw her yesterday and realize how much i truly missed her. before i started my drive home, yesterday was the best day i can remember having in well over a year. for the first time in as long as i can remember i was truly happy. it felt like i was in heaven is the best way i can describe it. and i'd give anything to feel that way again.... even if it means driving out there again next week (she has no classes on tusdays)

she knows i like her but not to the extent i have just realized myself. i approached her and told her i liked her back in high school but nothing ever came of it, just bad timing i guess. and the fact that i drove a total of 5 hours to be with her for only 4 hours goes to show something in itself...

cant believe i'm sayin this but i actually cried like a little bitch today. multiple times. i havnt truly cried like this in over 6 years. i still dont know if i feel ashamed or not but i cant believe i'm tellin this to you guys... but its the BC and not genmay so that makes me feel better at least. drinking maybe a very bad thing for me to do at this point... i locked up all the blades/knives i own incase i get any crazy ideas, and no i'm not saying just to get attention

on a more positive note, i did manage to eat 4 bagel bites... the other 5 are still sitting in front of me. i love pizza but i cant even bring myself to eat these puppies
Old 01-15-2003, 03:02 PM RedTalon19 is offline  
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Akhilez
'Cause I'm geeked up...geeked up....
 
nothing much more you can do after what has been said.....

cant really think of anything....

cept dont dwell on it man....loook ahead not behind, or you will miss what is in front of you....and i cant tell you what that is...you are your ownself...you must find the path
Old 01-15-2003, 03:28 PM Akhilez is offline  
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RedTalon19
 
uh ok update. i totally feel better now. kinda weird how it worked out but i just started talkin to some of my buddies over IM and eventually we got into the new hammers comming which lead to DDR which lead to SATA and DVDRs and all that shit.... totally took my mind off her.

i totally feel like i climbed outta a hole and now i'm looking down into it sayin... shit was i really down that fucking far? god i feel like a new man... holy shit. i've decided i'm gonna talk to this girl about it even tho i got outta my situation as fast as i got into it... i'm gonna need some closure so this shit doesnt happen again
Old 01-15-2003, 05:04 PM RedTalon19 is offline  
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#10  

Akhilez
'Cause I'm geeked up...geeked up....
 
*applaudes* good job

kthxggbye
Old 01-15-2003, 05:07 PM Akhilez is offline  
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#11  

plot
this is plot from http://plot.brainwashed.us
 
well damn.. there goes my suggestion of getting back at her by knocking up her best friend...
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Old 01-15-2003, 05:09 PM plot is offline  
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RedTalon19
 
Quote:
Originally posted by
well damn.. there goes my suggestion of getting back at her by knocking up her best friend...
actually her roommate was pretty damned fucking hot too... why do all the beautiful women live together... i just dont get it
Old 01-15-2003, 05:12 PM RedTalon19 is offline  
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#13  

Soybomb
 
Sucks doesn't it? Have a drink, go out with your friends and just have fun. I think its worse when your tired and think its just too much work to fap...
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Old 01-15-2003, 06:49 PM Soybomb is offline  
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illxluck
 
Getting Drunk or Stoned is a solution to damn near everything.
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Old 01-15-2003, 06:50 PM illxluck is offline  
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