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Kamia
 
Quote:
Originally posted by mathlete
Seriously, you put everything into one person and your life will crash down around you if/when something goes wrong.
Yes but thats the beauty of love, you dont think about things going wrong. All you care about is how happy your S/O makes you and how great it is to be with them.

If something does go wrong then you cry and get over it, they wernt for you.

I think alot of you are saying no to this "center of your world" thing because your not intrested in a longterm, loving relationship and that your with someone for the physical aspect. Im not saying this is true for you all, but i think this is the majority.

Last edited by Kamia; 01-22-2003 at 09:16 PM..
Old 01-22-2003, 08:46 PM Kamia is offline  
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#31  

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Lyndzie_kitten
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My bf is definately the center of my universe. But, before he was, It was me... so... I guess it's kind of both of us. It's hard when you were raised to be a selfish bitch... lol jk!!
I definately always try to put Jordan first, and I agree with vinnie in when he said that with out your s/o, life means nothing.
Life without love would bite.
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Old 01-22-2003, 09:03 PM Lyndzie_kitten is offline  
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#32  

mathlete
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Quote:
Originally posted by Kamia
Yes but thats the beauty of love, you dont think about things going wrong. All you care about is how happy your S/O makes you and how great it is to be with them.

If something does go wrong then you cry and get over it, they wernt for you.

I think alot of you are saying no to this "center of your world" thing because your not interented in a longterm, loving relationship and that your with someone for the physical aspect. Im not saying this is true for you all, but i think this is the majority.
Well, my problem is that I think about things going wrong. I guess I'm just a realist.

I'm in no way selfish about it though; even when I thought we might break up, I still wanted to do things for her to make her happy.

Maybe I do have a slight fear of commitment (however, since I've only been in a few relationships, I feel it's a little early to be picking out china together, so to speak) so my case might not be ideal. However neither is that of those that claim they put everything into the other person. I guess I lean a bit towards Ayn Rand here when I say that I feel both parties should be independent; that way, whenever they come to you, it's because of a conscious choice, not a need.

*I in no way claim that anything I said makes sense. I'm tired of thinking anyway right now; it's ruining my intarweb fun.
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Old 01-22-2003, 09:07 PM mathlete is offline  
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#33  

wargasm
 
Re: Re: guys is your gf the center of your world

Quote:
Originally posted by undertakr
I dont get this. Am i just stupid?

Anyways, My GF has not presented me with this question. If questioned, I would have a two step answer, short and then long.

One: No.

Two: That question is challenging me to pit the various aspects of my life that I love against each other. I Can't judge the various aspects of my life, I just enjoy them all when i get the chance. Your question cannot be answered without being hurtful in some way or another.

Yeah, she's awesome. But you have to take care of yourself before you can take care of any other person. Fail to take care of yourself, and you end up fucking everyone around you in the long run.
yeah! first intelligble response. many fully-baked cookies for you.
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Old 01-22-2003, 09:10 PM wargasm is offline  
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#34  

wargasm
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Lyndzie_kitten
My bf is definately the center of my universe. But, before he was, It was me... so... I guess it's kind of both of us. It's hard when you were raised to be a selfish bitch... lol jk!!
I definately always try to put Jordan first, and I agree with vinnie in when he said that with out your s/o, life means nothing.
Life without love would bite.
so I cannot have a fulfilling existence if I do not consistently kiss someone, or have sex with them? what about loving your family and your friends? that last statement of yours seems a bit open ended, as if the single people of the world who have not found a significant other are currently doomed. I do agree that life without ANY type of love is meaningless, but it can be expressed in many non-sexual or man/woman relationships.
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Old 01-22-2003, 09:15 PM wargasm is offline  
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#35  

Lyndzie_kitten
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All I have to say is don't put words in my mouth. I don't feel like giving a lecture, so that's all I'm gonna say.
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Old 01-22-2003, 09:18 PM Lyndzie_kitten is offline  
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#36  

click46
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when you're married, thats when they come first above everything. Before that, they're pretty damn important. but when your younger than 21, anything beyond a healthy fucking and some cuddling now and then is not good.
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Old 01-22-2003, 09:24 PM click46 is offline  
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#37  

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[QUOTE]Originally posted by Jmbothfsh
[B]Hmmm.... Is she at the center of my world? Yes. I love her more than anything and don't know what I'd do without her. I don't think this is a bad thing though. I'm at the center too. I wouldn't do anything to hurt my world, and I know she wouldn't either. I guess we're like co-emperor's of my w

well said
Old 01-22-2003, 11:01 PM daver is offline  
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#38  

KronK
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I think Lyndzie sent me this link because she wants me to comment. I'm gonna have to say that I'm in agreement with the concensus that revolving your life around another is simply unhealthy. It's called co-dependancy (as someone already said) and I believe it is a clinical (psychological?) disorder...

I've already expressed to my girlfriend that I love her more than I've ever loved anyone else and more that I think I'll ever love anyone else... ever. Not to sound rude or macho or anything at all like that but, imo, that's the best anyone should expect from me.

My life will never revolve around a SINGLE person or thing and I don't understand how anyone else's could possibly.
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Old 01-22-2003, 11:02 PM KronK is offline  
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#39  

trivial
 
#1: Me.
#2: GF.
#3: Everybody else.

For comparison, here's your old-fashioned chivalrous guy, your gentleman:
#1: Everybody else.
#2: Me.
#3: GF.
Old 01-22-2003, 11:51 PM trivial is offline  
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#40  

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Old 01-23-2003, 03:33 AM FM 2347 is offline  
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#41  

Soybomb
 
No they might be important but thats something that you can take too far too.
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Old 01-23-2003, 07:10 AM Soybomb is offline  
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#42  

GhEttOrAiD
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No... I've always been under the impression that leaving that sense of "omg he could easily leave me for any number of other women" is good to have... because that way the girl doesnt blow you off/takes everything more seriously/you're her priority...

NO personal experience but... thas just what friends have told me
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Old 01-23-2003, 11:53 AM GhEttOrAiD is offline  
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#43  

tigress
 
**I'm Elongirl's friend, and since I'm so upset I'll tell you my sad, sad story. (Also, reason why she made this).**

Drama alert...

So I've been going out with this guy for about a year and a half, and all of the sudden he's getting weird on me. He says I'm annoying, and I drive him crazy and the only reason he's staying with me is because he "loves me too much" and whatever else.

Backtrack about a week ago.
I told him he was the most important thing in my life. And I honestly meant it. I'd do anything for this boy, and he knows it. We got in a huge fight about how unhappy he is with me, and I blantently told him how I was the best thing that ever happened to him and he'd never find another girl like me. His reply: "You're not the best thing in my life. Not even close. My dad is, and it pissed me off when you said that to me because it isn't true and you're a lying bitch." Ouchies . He accuses me of trying to control him, when in reality I'm the one who rearranged my life and my friends so I wouldn't have ANY guy friends, and on aim my settings are that I can't talk to ANY guys. I did that because he was up my ass all the time thinking I was cheating on him when I would never even think of it. I'm not low like that. Here's some of our aim conversation.

<<Me: What is wrong with you? Why do you get mad at me when I do that, and yet you accuse me of trying to control you?
Him : Well when you tell me you do that and you make sure I don't know you do take it off you are hiding it from me and it makes me mad when you hide something form me cause you have something to hide.
Me: I have nothing to hide from you.
Him: Well why do you take it off?
Me: I don't know, no reason in particular.
Him: You make no sense you lie to much to me.
Me: Jesus H. Christ I'm not fucking lying to you. Get a grip.
Him: I don't like people who try and hide something from me and then lie to me about it after I find out.
Me: I didn't lie to you!!! This is insane.
Me: What the fuck are you talking about?>>

We're talking about him not letting me talk to guys on my screen name. He is driving me crazy, and I have no idea what to do. He controls everything I do, and then when I do something "bad" he gets mad acting like I betrayed him or whatever he'd like to think. This is getting too much, because I've never done anything to hurt him, he's the one who's hurt me and I've forgiven him. I have done so much for him, given up friends, family, and schoolwork, and he tells me I haven't. He also is sneaking around trying to figure out what I'm doing all the time because when he found out I took off that setting on aim he said he put me on his brother's buddy list so he could see when I did that . This boy has got to go, but I still love him .

What do you guys think I should do? I mean obviously there's a huge problem. And I didn't even get into the fact that he wants to "change our relationship for the better" meaning he's not happy now. I thought we were happy and I was happy until he told me there was shit wrong with us then I got unhappy. He told me that we're going to do things his way... Help please this is insane.
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Old 01-23-2003, 12:54 PM tigress is offline  
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#44  

PenguinMan
 
no, your boyfriend is insane. and you are a broken girl for putting up with it.
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Old 01-23-2003, 01:01 PM PenguinMan is offline  
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