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Golf(e)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by theNoid View Post
I cannot say this enough guys, stop pretending you're on dates or pretending to ask girls out.

"I would like to take you out on a Date, you and me. How about Friday?"


Enough with the, "Want to come over and ..." "My friends and I are doing <insert>, you should come!" "Want to get coffee sometime?" "Want to get dinner and do something?"


"I would like to take you out on a Date, you and me. How about Friday?"


In the OPs case you were about 80% there and made good effort by going in for the kiss. However, she came over with zero intent of being affectionate and you didn't know this because you did not put a label on what the night was. This was your mistake, but secondly she's a dumb fucking retard for coming over and leading you on.

Why did she do it? Because she a goddamn female and she'll take male attention any way she can get it, preferably if she gets to keep affection out of the picture and shut you down. You can avoid all of this in the future by using the word Date.

I would argue that this is a lost cause, however its early enough that you can probably get her back into you. How? Call her tomorrow and say, "Hey now that we're friends and all, I wanted to see if you could do me a favor?" Her, "Sure, whats up?" You, "I think your friend <insert name> is really beautiful and I would like to take her out on a date, make her laugh and treat her to something nice. Can you set me up? Perhaps introduce me so I can get her number?"

Her blood will boil with insecurity and jealousy. Not so much because of you, but because another female is out doing her, its a trigger deep within 'most' females that is quite easy to pull. She will clearly avoid setting you up, but you expect this. On the side you hook up with and take one of her friends out on a date and you could probaby sit back and stare at your phone just long enough before she would contact you ... flustered, frustrated. All of this meaning that she is now thinking about you one way or another.

Catch her while she's off balance, tell her you'll come pick her up for a dinner date. Bring her back to your place, smash it out the park and fire up some Call of Duty.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v1...Noid/fyeah.jpg

well.. at least the first part is good advice. im not so sure i agree with the rest. that course of action just seems... tiresome
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Old 11-19-2010, 01:27 AM Golf(e) is offline  
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Runding
 
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Originally Posted by Golf(e) View Post
well.. at least the first part is good advice. im not so sure i agree with the rest. that course of action just seems... tiresome

I kinda hope he follows through with it in it's entirety -- while on film. It would sure make for an entertaining YouTube vid
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Old 11-19-2010, 07:49 AM Runding is offline  
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#17  

theNoid
 
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Originally Posted by Foolioq View Post
Usually Noid, you're a good poster, but your post is full of hyperboles and assumptions.

Of course, and really I should have layed the sarcasm on thicker. I wasn't really being serious but more playful in response. Ultimately this girl is a lost cause because he did his part by having her over and making a move, not much more a guy can do.

But since she's out of the picture now, might as well go for the roommate lol.
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Old 11-19-2010, 10:26 AM theNoid is offline  
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Okay, so my friend has a new roommate, who I think is attractive and funny. We had hung out 3 days earlier this past weekend and Monday. So yesterday I asked her if she would like to go get dinner tonight, and then watch Dexter. She is a fan of the show but has only seen the first 2 seasons, and we had talked about watching it previously.

I intended for it to be a date, but I never specifically said "date". Apparently she didn't think so. So is that something I need to specifically say? We talked for a little while when she was leaving and I went to kiss her good night and she shot me down and said she wanted to be friends Am I a social retard or something?

I'm gonna have to disagree with Noid. I don't think it's her fault at all IMHO. If one of the girls whom I'm friends with just went in for a kiss when I thought we were just going out as friends, I would probably be shocked also.

Try generating more sexual interest/flirting between both of you versus thinking being around her is enough for her to see you in a romantic way.
Old 11-19-2010, 10:14 PM Trachei is offline  
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Of course, and really I should have layed the sarcasm on thicker.

I don`t think being sarcastic in this subforum is helpful.
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Old 11-20-2010, 12:45 PM Foolioq is offline  
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#20  

theNoid
 
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Originally Posted by Foolioq View Post
I don`t think being sarcastic in this subforum is helpful.

True, however part of my nonsense rings pretty true to home. While I dont recommend anyone 'really' go out of their way to cause drama, it certainly works lol. If he wanted, he could date her roommate, which would in turn infuriate her and then thats his queue.

However that advise was playful at best and probably should have been labeled as such to begin with.
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Old 11-20-2010, 09:54 PM theNoid is offline  
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Old 11-21-2010, 03:51 AM Golf(e) is offline  
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#22  

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next time don't apologize, its really nothing to apologize for

THIS.
Old 11-21-2010, 12:23 PM Gooch is offline  
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#23  

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If you're going to play games with girls, then you deserve every game they play to you. I find games like that to be a waste of time and brain-cycles.

naive much? The whole beginning "attraction phase" of a relationship is a series of tests that men and women do on each other. men, though, sadly enough and more often than not, fall into the woman's games and because they submit by willingly playing and losing said games, they become the pathetic friendzoned guy...

the guys who are good at women know how to fuck back with them and throw a little game in their face.

after the attraction is established, thats where the more comfortable phase of the relationship comes into play, and from there it should be straight shooting, unless you or the girl have some fucked up emotional circuitry.
Old 11-26-2010, 10:47 AM toasterstreudel is offline  
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WILLIAM NOT
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Originally Posted by toasterstreudel View Post
naive much? The whole beginning "attraction phase" of a relationship is a series of tests that men and women do on each other. men, though, sadly enough and more often than not, fall into the woman's games and because they submit by willingly playing and losing said games, they become the pathetic friendzoned guy...

the guys who are good at women know how to fuck back with them and throw a little game in their face.

after the attraction is established, thats where the more comfortable phase of the relationship comes into play, and from there it should be straight shooting, unless you or the girl have some fucked up emotional circuitry.
No. You only have to play the game if you choose to play that game. Friendzone is a term made up for people to feel better about not being able to screw the people they are attracted to but not vice versa.

There's a small degree of "game" I'll play, sure, but that's only the extent of my personality, not because I have some sort of plan laid out on how I'm going to get in someone's pants.
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Old 11-26-2010, 07:15 PM WILLIAM NOT is offline  
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No, at least you made the bold move and went in for the kiss. Most people would've frozen up and played it safe, then come on here making a post about wondering where they stand. At least you know. Props

qft. i disagree with william
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Old 12-01-2010, 12:05 AM fapling is offline  
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and yes, for sure second the do not apologize. what the hell are you apologizing for? her being mistaken about the situation? just communicate what the scenario is (i.e. use the word 'date') better more often

honestly there's no real way for her not to have thought this was a date, she played you. the annoying thing about dumb girls' games aren't the games, it's that they think you're dumb enough to fall for them. next time, call a girl on that shit
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Old 12-01-2010, 12:09 AM fapling is offline  
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s0me0nesmind1
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by theNoid View Post
I cannot say this enough guys, stop pretending you're on dates or pretending to ask girls out.

"I would like to take you out on a Date, you and me. How about Friday?"

Enough with the, "Want to come over and ..." "My friends and I are doing <insert>, you should come!" "Want to get coffee sometime?" "Want to get dinner and do something?"

"I would like to take you out on a Date, you and me. How about Friday?"

In the OPs case you were about 80% there and made good effort by going in for the kiss. However, she came over with zero intent of being affectionate and you didn't know this because you did not put a label on what the night was. This was your mistake, but secondly she's a dumb fucking retard for coming over and leading you on.

Girls aren't stupid, she went in full knowing it was a date. I mean... girls are attention whores, but they can completely sense when a guy wants them in any way. Any broseph experts here who disagree with this just have no clue.
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Old 12-01-2010, 02:10 PM s0me0nesmind1 is offline  
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#28  

theNoid
 
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Originally Posted by s0me0nesmind1 View Post
Girls aren't stupid, she went in full knowing it was a date. I mean... girls are attention whores, but they can completely sense when a guy wants them in any way. Any broseph experts here who disagree with this just have no clue.

They can sense it sure, and they'll eat up all the attention they can get no strings attached. But make no mistake, she was not there for a date. Girls are not as black and white as guys are .. there is so much gray to females its hard to wrap your head around.

Girls will know a guy is into them, but tolerate everything, soak up attention as long as possible and at a distance. They do this because it makes them feel good, pretty (like all the other prettier girls who always get male attention). They'll ignore obvious signs of things that could be considered dates, our of sheer denial. Then the second the guy gets a little too close, bam they'll tell you they just want to be friends.

The best advice always is to just be as upfront as you ever could be with women. "Hi nice to meet you, I'd like to take you out on a date. You, me." Meeting, crushing, playing coy then pretend and just lollygagging in general is no way to impress women and when they eventually shut you down it was all a waste of time. Up front shows no fear, its smart, its attractive and it saves a guy a shitton of wasted youth.

Most guys don't get it though, they won't listen. They'll continue crushing on girls, wondering when they'll get their shot. Problem is they had their shot, it was that first impression. So while guys pretend what it would be like to be with a girl, she's dreaming of Mr. NewGuyIJustMet, who is mysterious, new and might actually show interest back for a change.

Move fast, move on. When it works, stick with her and make the best of it. If you're lucky you'll become eachothers best friend and perhaps marry one day. Everything inbetween should be considered practice.
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Old 12-02-2010, 12:38 PM theNoid is offline  
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#29  

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Just checking back in on this post. I quit making any moves on this girl and moved on to someone else, who it seems to be going well with. The advice in this thread was good, thanks for everyone's suggestions and tips.
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Old 12-02-2010, 01:51 PM Rizen is offline  
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