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Fiah
Sinds ik als transseksuele prostituee bezig ben, heb ik mezelf eindelijk leren accepteren. PM me voo
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Misutiku
Tucker “WHAT?!? Huh, uh…DONDE ESTA FUCKING BANO?”
Janitor “AYA, AYA!”
Old 03-14-2005, 11:12 AM Fiah is offline  
#76  

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LeomanXVII
 
how come every timne we wipe our ass we have to look at the paper before we put it in the toilet?
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Yarn Boondoggles
Old 03-14-2005, 11:16 AM LeomanXVII is offline  
#77  

Bill Brasky
He killed Wolfman Jack with a trident
 
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i waffled at the miscarraige in the toilet
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I'm a Son of a Bitch and you fucking love me for it.
Old 03-14-2005, 11:20 AM Bill Brasky is offline  
#78  

MdBlades
 
This thread rocks.

1. Eat greasey onion rings.
2. Get in car to leave.
3. Sharted, with explosive results.
4. Go back in and wipe.
5. Go commando.
6. No profit.
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Furry Army of doom member.

I caught the jeep thing, now it burns when i pee.

2k7 Wrangler unlimted.
Old 03-14-2005, 11:21 AM MdBlades is offline  
#79  

MdBlades
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by LeomanXVII
how come every timne we wipe our ass we have to look at the paper before we put it in the toilet?

You gotta know when your done.
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Furry Army of doom member.

I caught the jeep thing, now it burns when i pee.

2k7 Wrangler unlimted.
Old 03-14-2005, 11:21 AM MdBlades is offline  
#80  

LeomanXVII
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by MdBlades
You gotta know when your done.
ur kinda right but still.. i could tell by the feeling MAYBE
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Old 03-14-2005, 11:26 AM LeomanXVII is offline  
#81  

notyou
lemcool
MY RING DOESNT FIT AROUND MY FAT FUCKING FINGER. REMIND ME
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by LeomanXVII
how come every timne we wipe our ass we have to look at the paper before we put it in the toilet?

to make sure u got it all, duh!
Old 03-14-2005, 11:27 AM notyou is offline  
#82  

RapedApe
 
now everyone is saying go commando after you shit...but...what if you shit while you are commando...?
Old 03-14-2005, 11:30 AM RapedApe is offline  
#83  

GhEttOrAiD
<--- EVOM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris
THIS THREAD DELIVERS!


Old 03-14-2005, 11:34 AM GhEttOrAiD is offline  
#84  

eileenbunny
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by RapedApe
now everyone is saying go commando after you shit...but...what if you shit while you are commando...?

Go naked

Buy new pants

Didn't your mom ever tell you not to go out without clean undies on?
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"Well, I've wrestled with reality for thirty-five years, Doctor, and I'm happy to state I finally won out over it."
Old 03-14-2005, 11:38 AM eileenbunny is offline  
#85  

lukeswall
 
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1)rimming
2)"problems" appear
3)Girl's face on the way
4)...
5)no profit.

true story

[fakeedit1] no

[fakeedit2]yes

[fakeedit3]maybe
Old 03-14-2005, 11:38 AM lukeswall is offline  
#86  

Malo
 
Mine is a story told from a slightly different perspective. I must warn you all, it is a tl:dr. But I promise it's worth it

When I was in high school, I had a job at the local grocery store. I was a bagger/cleaner, depending on the day. Well, I live in a small town, so the latest I ever worked was ten, and at that point, the store was devoid of all forms of sentient life, aside from the employees.

Anyways, I was in the back of the store, taking out some garbage, when I hear this over the intercom, through what can only be described as the worst attempt I have ever heard of not laughing, "Will the cleaner please come to the front of the store, there has been an...accident"

I assume it is a fellow coworker trying to play a prank on me, as it was nearly closing time, and there were not many people left in the store. I get up there to see a strage brown, muddy trail, that started about twenty yards from the bathroom. My manager looks at me, with tears in her eyes from laughing, and tells me that I had better start cleaning.

As she says this to me, I turn and look to the bathroom, and what do I see, but an incredibly gross, super-obese woman come out of the bathroom with a triumphant look on her face. Her legs, somehow forced into spandex shorts, are completely covered in shit. Her white shoes were brown. She walks past us with a slight nod as she passed and said "Someone made a mess in the bathroom, i think it should be cleaned"

I then wanted to kill this woman more than anything in the world, she was a horrible beast, that even Orc Fucker wouldn't touch with a ten foot pole. After spending the better part of an hour cleaning outside the bathroom, I dared a peek inside.

Now, I can handle a lot of things, but one look in this bathroom made me vomit all of my organs, and even possible some bones. There was shit and blood, literally everywhere. The floor, the walls, the ceiling. The ceiling for christ sakes!!! I don't know what unholy beast decided to torment my life that night, but it looked like the shit demon from Dogma exploded, but with blood. I am honestly convinced the lady went in the bathroom, bent over and just let loose as she ran about the room.

I promptly walked to my manager (who had been counting registers) and said "Well, I'm all finished cleaning. I am going to take off now" She said that was fine, and apologized for what I had to do. As I walked out the door, i turned to her and said "Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you, The soap needs to be replaced in the bathroom, and I don't have the storeroom key, can you do that for me?"

I then left the store with a very revolted, yet satisfied grin upon my face.

Needless to say, I got a VERY angry phone call when I got home. The only reason I didn't lose my job is that where I worked, if there was any trace of blood, a manager had to be the one to clean it up for sanitation reasons.

Thank god for stupid rules.
Old 03-14-2005, 11:48 AM Malo is offline  
#87  

Threnx
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLO
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Malo
Thank god for stupid rules.

Good story, A++ will read again
Old 03-14-2005, 11:52 AM Threnx is offline  
#88  

schzim
Likes it in the butt
 
People are staring at me as I read this and laugh.
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battol
Old 03-14-2005, 11:56 AM schzim is offline  
#89  

Monkeyass
Shackmaster
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Threnx
Good story, A++ will read again

QFT
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Ford Ranger Owner's Forum:
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2001 Ford Ranger XLT Extended Cab w/2.3L DOHC Mazda Duratec Engine

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Member of the Genmay Canon Club (Canon A75)
Old 03-14-2005, 11:58 AM Monkeyass is offline  
#90  

 


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