General [M]ayhem

Go Back   General [M]ayhem > General Forums > Vault of [M]ayhem!
Register Members List Mark Forums Read [M]erchandise Calendar

 
 
Thread Tools
Carl Rove
Schmuck
Why do people like you listen to me? You realized everything I say is a load of bullshit?
 
Carl Rove's Avatar
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by jewbloob
i particularly like the fetus farm idea. it will make stupid crazy christians go crazy, and the satellite photo is genius.

but then again the CRT idea is great. but the LCD one is terrible. if you want the LCD to sound bad dont say it emits electromagnetic rays or whatever. im not the greatest writer but you should say somethin along the lines of:

Scientists at [insert college] have linked Liquid Crystal Display (LCD) monitors with emitting traces of Radon

that will drive people crazy and it is more believable to someone who knows that LCD monitors do not use electron beams like CRTs

The whole point is, that the article is factually accurate, just misleading. LCD monitors DO give off electromagnetic radiation, and you CAN get cancer from electromagnetic radiation - the idiot reader will hopefully infer from this OMG MONITOR GIVES ME CANCER!!!111
__________________
^ I did not come up with these "original" thoughts; the Devil or one of his imps put these thoughts in my head and I adopted them as my own.

Currently being spied on by ECHELON (Anthrax Terrorist Bomb etc.)

UK Represent
Old 12-05-2004, 02:59 PM Carl Rove is offline  
#286  

Advertisement [Remove Advertisement]

teh fucking loser
tehmay
I love my cocks HUGE
 
you do know that if you send these are you are going to be fucking with peoples lives

and they may never be the same again
Old 12-05-2004, 03:00 PM teh fucking loser is offline  
#287  

snow_bored
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by g
A new government study has revealed that 3 in 5 children under 13 receive at least one piece of pornographic email per month. Authorites warn that parents should not allow children that young access to email, for their own protection.


dude... i so wanna take this one.

lemme think here. steal your tagline.

A new government study has revealed that 3 in 5 children under 13 receive at least one piece of pornographic email per month. Authorites warn that parents should not allow children that young access to email, for their own protection.

An anonomous marketing representative of PMO productions, an adult video company said, "The fact is, the porn industry is determined to addict children to pornography while they are still under the legal age of adulthood, similar to the tobacco company's campaigns in the 70's and 80's."

Companies that provide E-mail services such as MSN, AOL, and Yahoo!, as well as local internet providers with similar services such as Verizon and Comcast all know of these tactics, yet have done little to alleviate the amount of underage childeren exposed to pornography.

In fact, AOL, dispite their recent ads showing parents relieved that AOL protects their children better than ever, a recent study showed that adult websites pay AOL tens of thousands of dollars per year to allow various messages through to users of all ages.

"I couldn't believe it when I found my son's inbox had messages like one from "Charmaine Benitez". It's subject was "Would you send me a thank you card? " but inside were pictures and links to pornography." said Annette Bryson from Boulder, Colorado.





my creativity ran out. would need a reason to f/w or post to a site... but there's a generic article type thing. comments?
__________________
Proud Member of the Official Pink Floyd Club est. 12/2004

omg! not only is slimer jumping on your furniture but hes gonna slim the dog and then have slimersechs with u!?! -EthanHunt
Old 12-05-2004, 03:01 PM snow_bored is offline  
#288  

Piratec0re
 
VLAUT
Old 12-05-2004, 03:05 PM Piratec0re is offline  
#289  

Ironman
 
this is a good idea
Old 12-05-2004, 03:10 PM Ironman is offline  
#290  

Clyde
*beebeep*
Presenting Michael Knight as Lt. Mitch Buchannon, in a Musical by David Hasselhoff
 
Clyde's Avatar
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Piratec0re
VLAUT
not yet, BITCH!
Old 12-05-2004, 03:10 PM Clyde is offline  
#291  

Piratec0re
 
Hello my name is Abdul Makhtuhad Jabrha. I am sending you this e-mail because my father, the King of the Peoples Replublic of Dhurka has recently passed away. I inherited from him 25 million USD. However, after his death there was a military coup and I have been banned from the country, so I have no way of accessing my money directly. Can you please help me recover this money? If you do so, 20% of it will be deposited into your bank account, and 65% of it will be used for investing in a business venture of your choice. The other 15% will be used to as funds to support me and my family of 5. Please respond to this as soon as possible so that we will be able to have better chance of recovering said money.

- Abdul Makhtuhad Jabra
Old 12-05-2004, 03:13 PM Piratec0re is offline  
#292  

jim87654
Sponsored by SimHQ.com
 
Just when I was getting bored from genmay, this thread comes along. Good job everyone. I might contribute later.
__________________
Louis Potgieter (1951-1996) NEVER FORGET
ef70337154d8a0a9dc8d89a9d01bb579 [y yuo throw haet :( :(] porn may <3's yuo.
Old 12-05-2004, 03:13 PM jim87654 is offline  
#293  

Majiwobo
 
Recent Studies State That Orange Juice May Be Linked to Hearing Loss

Professor Randy Hill of the University of Florida, after several surveys and experiments, has come to the conclusion that hearing loss may be the effect of drinking frozen concentrated orange juice. Professor Hill believes that it is the way in which frozen concentrated orange juice is manufactured that causes these problems.

Professor Hills studies point to the evaporation of the frozen orange juice as the cause of hearing loss. During the manufacturing of frozen concentrated orange juice, freshly squeezed orange juice is exposed to extreme temperatures for a short period of time, the sudden change of temperature of the orange juice cause a chemical reaction which has now been proven to form a bacteria which infects the incus, or the "anvil" of the ear, and causes it to detereriate.

When sound waves enter the ear, it causes the molleus, or the "hammer" to vibrate against the incus. If the incus is deformed or detereriated, sound waves are distorted and hearing becomes much more difficult. Professor Hill reccomends to drink freshly squeezed orange juice instead of that from concentrate or from the market. Further studies are being taken.



..moments work..can someone please improve/add on?
__________________
REAL DUDES

6f0c248dcf07eafcd6fe6791f74a3d09

DO DUDES

Last edited by Majiwobo; 12-05-2004 at 03:19 PM..
Old 12-05-2004, 03:14 PM Majiwobo is offline  
#294  

thetooflepope
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by snow_bored
dude... i so wanna take this one.

lemme think here. steal your tagline.

A new government study has revealed that 3 in 5 children under 13 receive at least one piece of pornographic email per month. Authorites warn that parents should not allow children that young access to email, for their own protection.

An anonomous marketing representative of PMO productions, an adult video company said, "The fact is, the porn industry is determined to addict children to pornography while they are still under the legal age of adulthood, similar to the tobacco company's campaigns in the 70's and 80's."

Companies that provide E-mail services such as MSN, AOL, and Yahoo!, as well as local internet providers with similar services such as Verizon and Comcast all know of these tactics, yet have done little to alleviate the amount of underage childeren exposed to pornography.

In fact, AOL, dispite their recent ads showing parents relieved that AOL protects their children better than ever, a recent study showed that adult websites pay AOL tens of thousands of dollars per year to allow various messages through to users of all ages.

"I couldn't believe it when I found my son's inbox had messages like one from "Charmaine Benitez". It's subject was "Would you send me a thank you card? " but inside were pictures and links to pornography." said Annette Bryson from Boulder, Colorado.





my creativity ran out. would need a reason to f/w or post to a site... but there's a generic article type thing. comments?

Add some things where it would insinuate that the parents were visiting pr0n.
__________________
[M]ovie Buffs Club
Major Religious Figure of the Asian Crew
1998 Audi 1.8T Quattro
Han "Hot Soup" Tzu of Dragon Ar[M]y 12.22.04
Kir Kanos of the INS Executor
I-no-longer-touch-my-penis Club (starting tommorow)
Old 12-05-2004, 03:14 PM thetooflepope is offline  
#295  

Piratec0re
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Piratec0re
Hello my name is Abdul Makhtuhad Jabrha. I am sending you this e-mail because my father, the King of the Peoples Replublic of Dhurka has recently passed away. I inherited from him 25 million USD. However, after his death there was a military coup and I have been banned from the country, so I have no way of accessing my money directly. Can you please help me recover this money? If you do so, 20% of it will be deposited into your bank account, and 65% of it will be used for investing in a business venture of your choice. The other 15% will be used to as funds to support me and my family of 5. Please respond to this as soon as possible so that we will be able to have better chance of recovering said money.

- Abdul Makhtuhad Jabra

Hah as a precursor to this one, we should send people a media report of a bloody revolution that took place in africa but is being kept under wraps by the U.S. media and gov't
Old 12-05-2004, 03:14 PM Piratec0re is offline  
#296  

OneWhoKnows
(Morbo)
 
OneWhoKnows's Avatar
 
Bill Gates found guilty by Washington-based judge on account of those "$1,000 per email forwarded" joke emails as investigations found that the email had originated from Gate's personal email address. Judge ordered Gates to pay all participants $500 if they can provide proof that they participated.

Or something, I'm tired
__________________
Intarweb married to [H]ustler 12/08/03
OWK of Team OWK
Gen[M]ay Motorcyclist 2004 YZF-R1 / 2006 YZF-R6
Rang3find3r: "I am VERY proud of my victory over touareg, because shit, what the fuck else do I have to be proud of?"
Old 12-05-2004, 03:17 PM OneWhoKnows is offline  
#297  

ATP
 
ATP's Avatar
 
After my exams, I will definitely be a part of this. Unfortunately, my last exam is on the 16th.
__________________
Proud Member of the Dschinghis Khan Club

./ //''// ).____
/'/.../..../....:/|...._)
('(.......... \____|......)
\.................'...../.
..\'.Still.strokin'./
Old 12-05-2004, 03:19 PM ATP is offline  
#298  

gg
Kato
 
gg's Avatar
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by tehmay
you do know that if you send these are you are going to be fucking with peoples lives

and they may never be the same again
Right, and we'll all sit back and laugh at gullible morons who believe whatever they read in chain email, and I receive my kickback check from the LCD industry



I wouldn't be suprised if this thread ends up getting heavy external linkage after we send out these emails and the debunking process gets underway. I wouldn't be shocked at 1,000,000 pageviews by the end of the year.



Anyway, I'm writing "Orange Juice Linked to Hearing Loss" and "Radioactivity Found in Cat Litter A Cause For Concern" right now
__________________
But women and water are in short supply
There's not enough dope for us all to get high
I hear it gets better, that's what they say
As soon as we sail on to Cane Garden Bay
Old 12-05-2004, 03:19 PM gg is offline  
#299  

thetooflepope
 
"Danger, Will Robinson." The words of a robot, trying to protect his master. Unfortunately, not true. Studies now show that robots are now 10 times more likely to kill their masters. Yes, that includes your friendly AIBO.

In one macabre incident at a Sony factory, a "...perfectly programmed and designed," floor model went what the workers there call "absolutely goatse"- maiming one worker and severely damaging the facility. The foreman refused to comment.

In all probability, the defect was caused by the radiation given off by local LCD monitors that displayed motivational messages. This radiation can cause mild retardation in most model R49S chip powered robots, though the chips are not exclusive to robots, as the victims of a massage chair accident in a Kyoto mall will attest.
__________________
[M]ovie Buffs Club
Major Religious Figure of the Asian Crew
1998 Audi 1.8T Quattro
Han "Hot Soup" Tzu of Dragon Ar[M]y 12.22.04
Kir Kanos of the INS Executor
I-no-longer-touch-my-penis Club (starting tommorow)
Old 12-05-2004, 03:21 PM thetooflepope is offline  
#300  

 


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 03:45 AM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.